Interrupting All Programmes: I Need A Dodge!


I Need A Dodge

A new film by Nick Hall about Clash front man Joe Strummer opens soon at theatres in the U.K.

(There’s a play here on “dodgy” in British and “dodge” in American slang – but I’m too tired to think.)

Click on the photo or here to go to the film’s Web site.

World premiere was in October at the CBGB Film Festival.

God bless you Joe. RIP.


Bananart


banana.web

Beautiful Losers

by

Sammy

Ballpoint on banana

March 16, 2015

Sammy’s plan: Move to Savannah, tend bar, become a tattoo artist and writer

The title references Beautiful Losers, a 2008 documentary about street artists who created art from everyday material with influences including graffiti, punk rock and hip hop. Many became successful commercial artists.


Safe European Home: 2015


To Florida:

They got the sun, an’ they got the palm trees
(where’d ya go?)
They got the weed, an’ they got the taxis
(where’d ya go?)
They got the beaches, an’ they got the Disney
(where’d ya go?)
The land of no climate change, an’ the home of ol’ sparky
(where’d ya go?)
I’d stay an’ be a tourist but I can’t take the gun play
(where’d ya go?)

[With apologies to The Clash]
[Original words and music by The Clash]


The Clash wrote Safe European Home about a trip by Joe Strummer and Mick Jones to Jamaica after the band’s first album.

The original lyrics:

Well, I just got back an’ I wish I never leave now
(where’d ya go?)
Who dat Martian arrival at the airport yeah?
(where’d ya go?)
How many local dollars for a local anaesthetic?
(where’d ya go?)
The Johnny on the corner wasn’t very sympathetic
(where’d ya go?)

I went to the place where every white face is an invitation to robbery
Sitting here in my safe European home
Don’t wanna go back there again.

Wasn’t lucky an’ wouldn’t it be loverly?
(where’d ya go?)
Send us all cards, an’ have a laying in on a Sunday
(where’d ya go?)
I was there for two weeks, so how come I never tell now
(where’d ya go?)
That Natty Dread drinks at the Sheraton Hotel now
(where’d ya go?)

I went to the place where every white face is an invitation to robbery
Sitting here in my safe European home
Don’t wanna go back there again.

They got the sun, an’ they got the palm trees
(where’d ya go?)
They got the weed, an’ they got the taxis
(where’d ya go?)
Whoa, The Harder They Come, an’ the home of ol’ bluebeat
(where’d ya go?)
I’d stay an’ be a tourist but I can’t take the gunplay
(where’d ya go?)

I went to the place where every white face is an invitation to robbery
Sitting here in my safe European home
Don’t wanna go back there again.

Rudie come
From Jamaica
Cos Rudie can’t fail
Cos Rudie come
From Jamaica
Rudie can’t fail
Rudie come
From Jamaica
Cos Rudie can’t fail
Cos Rudie come
From Jamaica
Rudie can’t fail
Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie
Rudie can’t fail
Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie
Rudie can’t fail

Cos Rudie’s went there
And Rudie’s lived there
And Rudie come back, come back now

And Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie
Come back, come on
now oh now

Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie
Rudie can’t fail

Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie
Rudie, YOU CAN’T FAIL!

Rudie come on and Rudie come
And Rudie can’t fail

Explosive!
(Rudie come on, Rudie, Rudie… Rudie can’t fail…)
You’re day at home
You try the fog train
(Rudie, Rudie, Rudie, Rudie…..)
(You’re day at home, You try the fog train)
Rudie come back
And Rudie did
No else wants to be this way

Florida Governor’s Ban On “Climate Change”


Florida Gov. Rick Scott – best known for making billions as one-time head of the largest U.S. hospital chain – forbid state workers from using the phrase “climate change”.

There’s really nothing I can add. Except – as I have said many times – “welcome to Florida”.

Read all about it (click link to read just one of many stories).

Florida scientist told to remove words ‘climate change’ from study on climate change

Scott denies all this. My guess: He’s lying. Again.

scott

Florida’s Gov. Rick Scott

Lord Voldemort

Lord Voldemort

Scott auditioned for the role of Lord Voldemort in the Harry Potter series.

Just kidding.

Kickball


Today

I kicked a beach ball
with a two year old
I did not know her
Or her father (I presumed)

Back and forth
Back and forth
Kick . . . kick . . . kick . . .

Smiling (me)
Squeals, giggles, laughter (her)

My rock, island, my armor shield
crushed by a child

And she
never
even
noticed

[thanks to Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel]

On writing: “The lazy from to” Part II


First: An apology. I posted “The lazy from to” from a cafe. Bad Internet connection. A woman six feet away coughing like an emphysema ward (when she wasn’t waving madly at her laptop camera during a loud Skype chat).

So I left out the “from . . . to” I read this evening. Not the worst example. Just the one that made me say enough.

“Next week, the third annual St. Petersburg Conference on World Affairs, which is free and open to the public, takes place at USF St. Pete. Tackling everything from international criminal tribunals to sea-level rise, the three-day conference, chaired by retired Ambassador Douglas McElhaney, a St. Pete resident, aims to take a deeper look at issues that often get short shrift in the 140-character media landscape.”

A 69-word metaphor-mixing, cliche-ridden paragraph including the 43-word sentence with¬† “everything from international criminal tribunals to sea-level rise”.

OK, OK. It’s from the local alternative weekly – Creative Loafing (previously The Weekly Planet).

Doesn’t matter. The Wall Street Journal and The New York Times: Just as guilty.

 

 

 

On writing: “The lazy from to”

 


 

As a grad student I taught a journalism writing class. Many students hated me because I expected them to write a news story. A lead (lede). Who, what, when, where, why and how. It had to make sense. A misspelled word sent you from an A to a B if not worse. If you misspelled the president’s name – as in the U.S. president – you got an “F” on that assignment. Yeah – I was a real jerk.

That was many years ago. Today bad writing and editing are everywhere. One thing that makes me want to slap editors and writers silly is what I call the “lazy from . . . to”. Yes, I just made that up.

It goes something like this: “The store sells everything from bananas to telephones.” Except “bananas to telephones” isn’t a continuum – at least not one I recognize. Yes there have been banana-shaped telephones. Bananas and telephones might be sold in the same store. But it’s not a “from to”. It’s just lazy writing.

It would be like saying “I’ve seen everything from television to Niagara Falls.” You cannot tell from this simple declarative sentence that I’ve seen anything other than television and Niagara Falls.

Or “she’s been everything from a waitress to public transit token collector”. Again – nothing.

That is the point. A reader must be able to imagine the array of products, visual experiences or jobs being described. ¬†Bananas to telephones, television to Niagara Falls and waitress to public transit token collector. I could just as well have said “I’ve seen everything from bananas to telephones” or “I’ve seen everything from a waitress to a public transit token collector”. I might have seen all these – but the “from to” implies something that does not exist.

As I said – lazy writing. You see it everywhere – especially the “lazy from to”.

Pablo Picasso


To J
 

 

Pablo Picasso

by

The Modern Lovers

Well some people try to pick up girls
And get called assholes
This never happened to Pablo Picasso

He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare and
So Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole

Well the girls would turn the color of the avocado
When he would drive down their street in his El Dorado
He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare
Pablo Picasso never got called an asshole
Not like you

Alright
Well he was only 5’3″
But girls could not resist his stare
Pablo Picasso never got called an asshole
Not in New York

Oh well
Be not schmuck, be not obnoxious,
Be not bell bottom bummer or asshole
Remember the story of Pablo Picasso
He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare
Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole

Alright this is it
Well
Some people try to pick up girls
And they get called an asshole
This never happened to Pablo Picasso
He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare and so
Pablo Picasso was never called…


 

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